WOW! I was just delivered the insight as to why Red, my actual boat, came into my life 20 years later. I never understood how or why that happened. I was stumped…
In a time that marked the beginning of my dark night of the soul, it was, quite simply, a miracle. I had searched for her and searched for her of all of my life without her. I wanted my little boat back so badly. I would not buy another boat, only Red.
For that very vessel to turn up in the very state that I had moved to. On that very body of water… There is just no way, the odds don’t even apply! God was directly speaking to me. I didn’t get the message.
I wasn’t supposed to get the message until later. He was flexing His muscles, giving me proof of His existence at the time. I think. I already know He is real now, of course, but maybe I am supposed to reflect back to this experience when I feel I don’t know Him anymore. It cannot be unmade, and it cannot be doubted. Ever! It is proof that He was there, and He was communicating to me that He would hold me through all that was coming. I didn’t get the message.
The dark night did not take my sanity, or my life. It was necessary for me to get here. I get the message now.