The choice I am making today, of giving up on something terrible for me that I can no longer keep within my control, turning it over to a God with a personality, has resulted in my ability to see the God without a personality. There is a simple system of laws that will not conform to anything other than what He has put in motion. Continuing to feed an addiction will simply do that. Feed it. Impersonal. But in finally recognizing that as a fact, a law of nature, I can resign in the knowledge of it. Then. Then. I feel the intimate God.
He is The One who is pleased with me. The One who wants to walk with me, be by my side every day. Whisper in my ear, things I don’t know and should not know. Secrets between He and I. Things, little glimpses of what I can have. Things He will give me. What I can become as long as I understand His laws, and that He is not attached emotionally to my choices, but observes them. However, when I choose well, and turn to Him once more, there is only abundant love inside of me, and an expansion of what is my self.