Tragedy is a calling.
Writings
We cannot call the experience of divine union into our daily lives, that is a gift. We can however assume the stance that offers the least resistance to be overtaken by what we cannot attain.
– Jim Finley
A New Perspective
I have been once again restored to a feeling of blissful union that accompanies me throughout the day. I have a new understanding of the Divine though.
The feeling comes from all around, in every direction, not from above. God is nondirectional. God is not a He.
God no longer feels like a low thrum in the background, but a permeating mist that is radiating off of everything that surrounds me. What I am aware of and not aware of.
This feeling does not have a beginning or an end, and it exists whether I realize it or not.
When the student is ready, the master will appear.
I no longer feel the need to write. I feel the need to contemplate. Pray. Allow the Divine in through everyday experience. Whether good or bad. Just to remain present, or with what has been called mindfulness. When I wash my hands, I notice the soap and water only. When I cook dinner, I pay attention to the smells and effort of it all. When I eat, I sit at the table in silence, tasting. Simply that.
I have found a new teacher and I am completely in love with him. He explains what the books I have been pouring over for the past two years mean. He comforts those of us who have been lost in the mystical experience, and breaks down the writings of the monks and nuns into relative terms. He speaks of God being in love with us. And our souls being in love with God. The Beloved and the lover. We are only lost in the illusion of life. He speaks of aridities and consolations. How not to be afraid and bereft when they are gifted and then taken away. And finally, he shares his life’s work; consoling the mystic who is confused by the experiences that he or she is having in this present time.
I was introduced to this modern mystic on July 5th, just two days ago, and synchronistically one year to the day that I started this journal. My times of doubt are no longer a threat, so this writing could fall by the wayside. My feelings acknowledged and my heart’s worries contended. Yes, this is what Jim Finely is giving me. A reason, a concrete reason, that I no longer need to be afraid. Not of my experiences. Not of them being taken away. There is a path, and I am on it. I have been called, but needn’t do anything. And most importantly, right now, I am being taught how to pray correctly at the contemplative level.
“You don’t need to come here to find me.”
– At the Chapel on the Rock
The Chapel on the Rock
I drove up to 8500 feet to the base of Mt. Meeker- St. Catherines “Chapel on the Rock.” As I knelt down to pray, before I even formed the words, You spoke to me. “You don’t need to come here to find me.” Simple words of what I already knew. Once more trying to get You back. Once more not able to.
When we long for a life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds, and diamonds are made under pressure.
– Peter Marshall
When you are a beginner, it is your choice whether or not to be intimate with God. When you are called to walk the mystic’s path, it is not.
There are things we imagine. And there are things thrust upon us in our imagination.
“Several Times in the Last Week”
Ever since happiness heard your name it has been running through the streets trying to find you.
And several times in the last week, God Himself has even come to my door
Asking me for your address!
Once I said, “God, I thought You knew everything. Why are You asking me where
Your lovers live?”
And the Beloved replied, “Indeed, Hafiz, I do know everything.
But it is fun playing dumb once in a while. And I love intimate chat
And the warmth of your heart’s fire.”
Maybe we should make this poem into a song, I think it has potential!
How far does this refrain sound, for I know it is a Truth:
Ever since happiness heard your name, it has been running through the streets
Trying to find you.
And several times in the last week, God Himself has come to my door,
So sweetly asking for your address, wanting the beautiful warmth of your heart’s fire.
– Hafiz